Who Do You Spend Time With?

When I was 25 years old, someone suggested that I should join a Vistage Group.  Vistage is a CEO peer group organization where you get together with other executives in non-competitive industries each month in a meeting facilitated by a group chair.  I remember after my first meeting feeling way in over my head and asked my chair, why on earth he recommended me to join.  Most of the business owners and executives in the group were almost twice my age and had years of experience and success behind them.  He assured me that I would be fine, to learn as much as I could from the group and in time I would have plenty to share. The meetings were a safe place to share information and at the same time they were often intense, filled with direct feedback that challenged assumptions and shed light on things that allowed me to make better decisions.  It was an instrumental time for me and my growth as a business leader.

Perhaps the most valuable lesson that I learned from my Vistage experience was the importance of surrounding yourself with great people.  I feel like historically I’ve done a pretty good job of this, but I’ve been reflecting the past couple weeks on the people outside of work that I spend the most time with and asking some hard questions.  Are they people that drain my energy and leave me feeling exhausted after interacting with them? Or am I energized and ready to take on the world when I finish a conversation?  I believe the weight of our current events has caused me to notice the sharp contrast in some of my meetings or calls.  It has made me want to be even more intentional about the people I invest my time in, and surround myself with.  I want to be around people who aren’t afraid to point out my shortcomings, challenge me, share a different view point, inspire me, and ultimately help bring out the best in me.

It’s comfortable to be the smartest person in the room, but all the way back to the 6th century BC, Confucius said; “If you’re the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.”  Surrounding yourself with great people can be uncomfortable, letting go of negative relationships isn’t easy and that discomfort is exactly what we need to grow and become better versions of ourselves. 

Jim Rohn said: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”  So when you look at those five people in your life that you spend the most time with, are you proud of the average?  Or do you need to make some changes to help get back on the path to reaching your full potential?

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.  Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too, can become great.” - Mark Twain

*Each week I share a leadership message with our team and we are honored to share it with you via MIBE Tribe.  MIBE (the acronym for Make It Better Everyday) Tribe delivers education on heart leadership and intentional culture building for the hospitality industry.

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